Going A.P.E. – The Art of Actively Participating and Experiencing

Posted by on Oct 11, 2013 in Blog | Comments Off on Going A.P.E. – The Art of Actively Participating and Experiencing

Through the years of life to this point, I have come into many times when things seems as though they were falling apart, as if my world was caving in.  Times when it felt like I had no control or that someone was “wronging” me. 
            When I get into those times, when those thoughts start trickling in, I have had to come up with a way to recognize and get myself out of the lower vibration.  I tend to slide into a depression or like the world did not want me around.  It is strange, as that is not my true nature, but this is a battle I have had for years.  Some may say depression, other may say I have expectations, other will project that it’s bi-polar or the PTSD.  Over time I realized it was not one of those things at all.
            It was easy to mask it as depression or anger or some pendulum swinging back and forth of emotions.  People see what they know or what they have been told.  What was really happening was I was shutting down and shutting out the world around me.  I have found myself sequestered for weeks only reaching out via the computer or a text if even.  It’s been a battle my whole life.  Yes, it stems from abuse and so many other life experiences but just when would I find a way to grab it by the balls and not let it affect or infect my life?
            I realized when I was speaking with people I wouldn’t hear everything that was said.  My brain was too busy thinking of the next thing to say.  Of course, when I spoke, what came out tended to be statement about what I was going through and not in response to what the other person was trying to tell me. I wasn’t listening, but I was projecting a crisis.  See, when you are brought up in a life of crisis (abuse, single parent, death of loved ones, etc) a filter is made at how you see the world, or at least there has been a HUGE one for me that is taking years to remove. 
I didn’t recognizing I was broken. What I knew no longer was working and I needed to grow.  Realizing so much of what I had been taught was not how the world worked in reality.  The things I was not exposed to as a child challenged my adult mind.  I was TOLD it was different but experiencing something opposite of what I had been taught!  I hadn’t been actively participating in my life.  Through the trauma’s, I shut myself down and into a submissive being.  I allowed the manipulation of my emotions and even my life with the people and things I had allowed into it.  Even though I thought I had worked on those issues years ago, here they are haunting me again.
            Because of recognizing these patterns in me, I had to find a way to push through to the other side.  I needed to find a way to shift my perception and challenge what I thought I knew.  The words “Go APE” came to me. I laughed.  Was I to go nuts!  Was I to just loose it and freak out!  That actually sounded appealing but after some time of thinking, recognized that would lead me nowhere.
            Going APE…..what was my brain saying?  I thought for a bit.  APE had to stand for something my brain wanted to teach me so I look carefully at the word and let it tell me what it meant. A is for Action (getting off your butt and doing something), P is for Participation (reaching out and asking for help and allowing the lessons take you to what you need to know) and the E representing Experiencing/Exploring  (allowing yourself to take in the entire picture of your situation, not just the narrow view you have been filtering it through).  Actively Participating in the experience, going APE.
            WOW, how simple was that?  As I pondered those words, the past started flooding my mind.  There had been so many situations where I had turned myself off and gave no response or action to what was happening in my world.  I was playing a victim even though I didn’t mean or understand it that way that was the energy I was giving off.  Times when I wasn’t listening but only blabbing about poor me or crying wolf as many would call it.
            The emotions struck me upon that discovery that day.  I knew that one of my major challenges so far had been how to Actively Participate and Experience each and every moment of life.  Learning and growing and actually seeing the world for what it is.  To get out of my head and BE WHERE I AM AT THAT TIME. Truly be present in what the world is trying to teach me and support me with.
            To this day, I slide back into those filters and programs of old.  I am but in the human-suit and takes conscious effort to be present and not just let the programs kick in.  It’s through being present in each moment and not stuck in a past story in your head.  To many of us get caught up on “what should have been” instead of “what is”.
            I encourage you to try out this process.  Let those simple words speak to you when you are feeling defeated, stuck and challenged.  That is the best time to GO APE!  Reach out and Actively Participate and Experience what the world is trying to offer you, in every moment, every step, every second of your being!  Let it show you how to break out of the old and bring you to the higher awareness of your surroundings, into the truth of this moment of now.
Learn to ask questions and listen, when you start to feel yourself move into that shutting down feeling.  That is the time to communicate and reach out. Your spirit is asking for the healing at that time.  Your brain wants to break the cycle and that is why it comes up.  What a more perfect time to GO APE!
            No one has all the answers.  The journey is yours to experience in any way you wish but wouldn’t it be nice having nothing to hold you back?  This is yet another tool to help recognize the blocks weather real or imagined.  So the next time you feel yourself spinning, stop, take a deep breath and see what the APE has to say.
            Looking forward to hearing how it works for all of you.  Again, yet one more tool for your tool box of life.

A is for Action (getting off your butt and doing something, get that energy

P is for Participation (reaching out and asking for help and recognizing your
Participation in this.  Recognizing the steps you took that got you into these feelings/situation to begin with)

E representing Experiencing/Exploring  (allowing yourself to take in the entire picture
of your situation, not just the narrow view you have been filtering it
through and allowing it to transform those outdated beliefs or blocks)

Time to GO APE!